Sisters. We love them and we hate them. They steal our things, eat the last chocolate chip cookie and are always the first to point out our regrowth. But they also happen to be great secret keepers, so wise about boys and totally agreeable when you think your mum has lost the plot (chicken mince and pasta should NOT be a regular dinner. Shudder).
If you’ve never had a sister, it probably seems weird that two people can go from being the closest friends in the world to wanting to burn each other’s possessions in two seconds flat. How does it escalate so quickly? Well, it goes a little something like this:
1. Your sister finds you wearing her shirt. You try to argue said shirt was left in your room, therefore you assumed that she was gifting you the shirt.
2. Your lie is completely and utterly unbelievable and you’re in big trouble. (You used the “OMG, we bought the same shirt!” excuse last time so that’s out.)
3. Your sister’s eyes turn black as a devil possesses her body. She claims you are an embarrassment to the family and wishes that a) you had never been born, b) you would hurry up and move as far away as possible or c) SHE could move as far away as possible.
4. Challenge accepted. Are you literally breathing fire right now? Probably. You spring forward with a battle cry and the two of you begin screaming insults at each other that you’ve bottled up since your last fight. That time you said you’d pay her back and never did. That time she said hi to your ex-best friend and thus betrayed every part of the sisterly code. The fact that her new hair colour actually looks hideous and you were just too nice to say anything. That you never want to speak to each other ever again.
5. You storm away, fuming about the accusations she’s made against your character and spend the rest of the day sulking and thinking of ways to back up your argument when you get home, only to find your mutual hate of Cathy on the new episode of Australia’s Next Top Model is strong enough to negate the argument and let you resume best friend status.
My house has been home to many great conflicts. There was the Walnuts in the Brownies saga (let’s just say if you don’t like walnuts in brownies then perhaps you could consider doing the baking and not complaining about my cooking? I’m looking at you, Sophie.)
Then there was the recent “blonde shampoo” ordeal. You know, when your younger sister uses your expensive blonde shampoo and forgets to hide the evidence (open bottles are a dead giveaway, Kate). Then you find her using it AGAIN only a WEEK later and you officially begin a civil war in your bathroom.
Thankfully, in spite of the semi-regular catfights, you all secretly know you love each other. Because who else would help you get revenge on your 11th grade boyfriend and support you through thick, thin and downright awkward eyebrow stages?
And maybe things would be better if we could all agree to stop snooping through each other’s things. Ha. Like THAT’S ever going to happen. What? This shirt looks good on me.
Feature Image: Sisters (2015), Universal Pictures
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