Just read it already. You’re running out of time.
So you’re THAT person who’s looking for a last-minute Secret Santa gift and you need something that will make it seem like you’re not a garbage human being.
Don’t worry. I’ve got your back. Because my Secret Santa gift is FINISHED so I have time to help you with yours, you adorable sloth.
1. Instant Downloads
If they love decorating their desk space, Etsy (thankfully) has a whole bunch of art prints that are available for instant download so all you have to do is print it on the nice paper at your office and not tell anyone about it. Then frame it up and hand it over like you’ve painted it yourself.
2. Rude Cross Stitch
Seriously, Etsy is a gold mine. Especially if you happen to have mad craft skillz. Just type “rude cross stitch” in the search bar and watch the results roll in, usually with instant PDF pattern downloads.
Note: I only recommend this for people who have actually done some kind of cross stitch in their life and who can pull this off quickly. And I take no responsibility if you don’t like swearing. Why are you looking up rude cross stitch if you’re so easily offended? Get out of here.
Psst: this Not Today Satan design is from TheQuirkyMermaidShop.
3. Novelty socks
This is the perfect way for someone to subtly embrace their inner darkness. These ones from Typo are actually supposed to be for men but if you want them for someone else then who cares? They’re socks, dude. Let them warm up someone’s feet already.
4. The No Button
For the person in the office who has to sign off on everything. They can break the bad news about your annual leave approval AND earn your everlasting hatred in one swift move. You can pick one up from your local Officeworks or department store.
5. Beer medal
For that person who’s always banging on about how they drink like a champion. Side note: they will never deal with hangovers like a champion. Avoid them at all costs after you get this from Cotton On.
6. Mugs with attitude
Some people are just not human before coffee and Kikki.K is all about that life. Unfortunately, there’s no guarantee that they’ll actually use the mug you get them because they might need to inject caffeine straight into their veins.
7. Keyboard cover
A keyboard cover is just common sense for that person who always eats breakfast, second breakfast, elevenses, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner and supper at their desk. Especially if they get crumbs everywhere like a filthy little hobbit. You’re just looking out for them. And the functionality of office equipment.
8. Scratch Map
This handy map allows them to scratch off all their travel destinations to reveal pretty colours! Bonus if they’re a traveller who also happens to be addicted to Instant Scratch-Its.